Lacey

His words were beautiful. 

“I want the same.”

I had tried to protect him, but there was no point now. It was too late; I had run out of time.

He smiled at me and leaned forward. He kissed me so tenderly I lifted my hands to his face and cradled his face as his lips moved softly against mine. The love I felt for him swept through me, and I felt myself shiver at the intensity of it. 

He pulled away and looked just as affected by the kiss as I was. His eyes glittered with emotion. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay,” I said. I didn’t want to admit that he’d hurt me when he’s walked away. What happened before seemed inconsequential now.

“When we first found out about the tumor, it scared me. And when you delayed your surgery, I was so angry with you.” His eyes held mine for a moment as he paused. “I felt like you were just giving up, I wanted you to fight.”

His words reminded me of the things that I may never have, and I felt a sadness spread through me. I felt the sting of tears. 

“I shouldn’t have walked away, and I shouldn’t have said the things that I did. It’s easy for me to stand on the sidelines and tell you what to do. Maybe if I’d been in your shoes, I would have done the same.”

I reached out and caressed his face with my free hand. “I never meant to hurt you.” My voice hoarse. Seeing him struggle with my decision had been one of the hardest things to watch.

“I know that.” He stared at me for a moment. His beautiful blue eyes held mine. “I hate that there is nothing I can do, I’ve never felt so helpless.”

I swallowed hard. He was right there was nothing he or my family could do to increase the odds in my favor.

He leaned forward and kissed me. The kiss was so gentle that it brought tears to my eyes. I savored the feel and taste of him for a few moments after he lifted his lips from me.

My brother entered the room with the Dr. Clark behind him.

“Miss Harper.” The doctor looked through the chart in his hands.

“Hi.” I was nervous. It was time.

A deep fear settled over my nervousness while I watched the doctor as he looked through the file. But there was no way to know how bad because veiled features, revealing nothing.

He closed the chart.

It wasn’t good news, and I knew it before he even started speaking.

“We have to do the surgery now.” His tone was firm, not open to any argument. “I will not lie to you. Delaying the surgery has increased the risk.”

My time was up, it was time to do the surgery. It scared me. Adonis’ hand tightened over mine, reassuring me as I felt a cold shiver through me at the thought that these could be my last moments.

“Okay.” My voice held all my emotions.

“I’ll do everything I can,” he said. “They’re going to prep you for surgery.”

Unable to speak for the fear of my emotions breaking free, I nodded my head. I wanted to scream and cry at how unfair it was, but I had already learned life wasn’t fair. I couldn’t even comprehend they were going to cut into my head, so I tried not to think about it.

“How long before you operate?” It was Adonis who asked the question.

“Three hours.” Then the doctor left.

A heavy silence settled.

“Reece.” I remembered I’d made plans to go out with her today. Someone had to call Aiden as well.

“I’ll call her.” Alex took out his phone and dialing her number. In a hushed tone, he spoke over the phone. His eyes stayed on me. I saw his fear.

“I’ll be okay.” My words were empty, I did not know what was going to happen, I didn’t even know if I had a chance, but I felt I had to give him some hope even if I didn’t have any.

“You have to,” he whispered, like I was his world. He leaned his forehead against mine and I closed my eyes.

I had to be realistic about my chances. I opened my eyes and Adonis lifted his head. These few hours before my surgery could be all I had left, and I needed to make peace with the fact that I might die.

There were things I needed to say. “I love you.” He nodded his head. “I’ve loved you since I was thirteen years old and I’m sorry things didn’t work out like they should have… we should have had more time.”

“Having you in my life has been the best thing that’s ever happened to me, and I wouldn’t wish it away for anything. My life has been anything but normal. The moment I fell for you it became extraordinary,” he argued softly.

I felt emotion overwhelm me at his words and a tear escaped down my cheek. I brushed it away.

“Don’t cry,” he said in a whisper.

“You have a way with words, Mr. Grayson.” It was true, he had a way of saying something that made me feel his words.

“It’s a talent,” he said, and my smile increased.

“Reece is on her way,” Alex said. “She said she’d call Aiden and let him know.”

Three hours and the clock was ticking. I had to stop myself from looking at my watch constantly.

When my mom arrived back with my stuff, my father was with her. Adonis and Alex left to me a moment alone with my parents. My mom and father stood together beside me.

“I love you.” I could see she was trying to put on a brave front for me, but I didn’t want her to.

“It’s okay, mom.” I’d put through them so much, and I felt a moment of guilt for it.

“We love you,” my father said.

I didn’t want to talk to them like it was the last time, but I had to face the chance that I wouldn’t make it. It could be the last time I got to talk to them.

“You are the best parents. You’ve always been there for me and done anything you could for me. I just wanted to say thank you,” I said, needing them to know how they meant to me.

My mom burst into tears and hugged me close. My father’s eyes glistened and his arms wrapped around both of us.

A little later Reece arrived she was emotional. It surprised me to see Aiden walk in behind her.

Reece rushed to one side of the bed and hugged me. Tears escaped down her face. Aiden walked to the other side of the bed. He looked worried as he watched Reece hug me like her life depended on it. By the time she pulled away, she was brushing the tears away from her eyes.

“It’s okay.” I gave her my bravest smile, trying to cover up the fear that I felt.

“I love you.” She hugged me again.

“I love you too,” I said.

“You really know how to do this the dramatic way. You had to get the ambulance involved,” he said lightheartedly, and I gave him a smile. He was joking with me, but I saw past that.

“You should have seen the crowd that saw me off,” I said, and he grinned.

He bent down and hugged me for a moment before he squeezed me tightly.

The more time that passed and the closer I got to the end of my three hours, the more nervous and on edge everyone around me became.

Five minutes before the nurse said she was going to take me to surgery, all my loved ones gave me one last kiss and hug. The last person to hold me was Adonis. I let out an emotional breath, trying to keep my fear from sending me into a panic. He pulled back and his eyes caressed me as he cradled my face in his hands. “I love you.” He stared into my eyes.

“I love you too.” My voice hoarse.

“You’ll be okay,” he said. I took comfort in his words. “And after you recover, we’ll have all the time we need.”

In his eyes there was no other option, and I allowed the confidence he felt to wash over me. I took strength from him. For a few moments, we stared at each other before he pressed his lips to mine and kissed me one last time. It didn’t matter that there was an audience.

“I’ll see you soon.” His eyes searching mine for confirmation as his hands cradled my face.

I wouldn’t allow myself to think of the fact that I might not see them soon. Instead, I nodded my head, giving him the confirmation that he needed from me. There was no way I could guarantee it, but I gave it anyway.

“As soon as you recover, I’m going to take you out on our first date,” he said, and I covered his hands with mine.

“I want that,” I whispered. I had to believe that there was some hope that I would have the future to do that.

He gave me a brief kiss to my forehead before pulling away.

The nurse appeared in the doorway and she gave me a friendly smile when she came into the room, but it did nothing to dispel my growing fear. Another nurse joined her and they wheeled me out of the room. My last look at my family, friends, and the guy that I loved more than anything I held onto as they disappeared from sight.

My emotions amplified, and it took everything in me not to cry like a baby. For the next few minutes, I felt panicked. The medication set in and I remembered my family and friends. I smiled as I remembered the promise that Adonis made to take me out on our first day. My heart lifted when I remembered his gentle kiss.

My eyelids grow heavy and I let the darkness spread through me.

**********

Adonis

From the moment they wheeled her into surgery, I paced up and down. Every moment that passed became more difficult to keep my nervousness from breaking through, I was a mess.

She’ll be okay. I told myself repeatedly. Wishing it was true. I ran a hand through my hair as I stopped to lean against the wall, my eyes fixed on the door that they had wheeled Lacey through.

Movement beside me pulled my attention to Aiden, who was standing beside me.

“She’ll pull through.” He echoed my thought.

“She has to,” I said.

There was no other option, she had to make it through the surgery. She had to survive. I heard a door open and my eyes found my bandmates walking toward me; I pushed off the wall as they stopped in front of me.

“Sorry it took us so long.” Link gave Lacey’s mom and dad a sympathetic look.

“How did you know?” I asked, surprised they were here.

“Alex called me,” Link answered. I shot a look to my best friend, and he just nodded his head.

“Glad you guys made it.” I wasn’t handling things like I’d hoped. My band mates weren’t just my band mates they were family. I do anything for them and they’d do the same for me.

“How long has she been in?” Sage asked.

“An hour,” I answered. It had felt so much longer.

“How long is the surgery?” Link asked.

I shrugged. “The doctor said it could take anywhere from a few hours to eight. He said it all depended on how complicated it was to remove the tumor.”

Saying the words out aloud made me think of what was happening in surgery and I felt a cold fear settle in me. It felt like a physical pain in my chest thinking about them cutting her open. I felt a hand on my shoulder and looked to Link, who squeezed my shoulder reassuringly.

“She’ll be okay, man,” he said.

I nodded.

For the next few hours, my friends stayed to support me. While I paced the hallways trying to talk myself into the fact that every minute that passed without news meant she was probably still alive. But on the flip side, the longer I took, the more complicated the surgery was becoming, and that wasn’t a good sign either.

Finally, after seven hours of waiting, I saw the doors swing open and Dr. Clark walk out, still dressed in his scrubs.

Everything had led up to this moment.

I followed Harp’s parents, who walked up to him. Alex was beside me and Link stood on my other side. I felt the fear twist in my gut when I couldn’t decipher the doctor’s expression.

“We got it out,” he told us. Relief flooded through me. “There were no serious complications, but the next few hours are going to be the most critical.”

Most critical. Echoed in my mind and the fear I’d felt before stepped up a level to terror. I couldn’t think about that, I had to believe she would wake up.

“Thanks,” I said to the doctor. “How long before we can see her?”

I wanted to see her so badly. I wanted to hold her hand in mine while I watched over her.

“They’re busy cleaning her up, she should be in her room in about twenty minutes.”

As the doctor walked away, I rubbed my hands over my face. I let out a deep breath, trying to ease the building nervous fear inside of me. Mr. Harper hugged Mrs. Harper. When I looked to Reece and Aiden were standing together. 

The wait wasn’t over.

It was late, but no one left. I even told my guys to go home, but they refused. Link and Sage went to get coffee while everyone else waited patiently to see her.

The moment the nurse walked into the waiting room and told us we could see her, I was on my feet and following behind her to Lacey’s room.

I stopped for a moment before I entered her room, the sight of her in the hospital bed hooked up to machines took my breath away. It brought the reality home of what she’d been through and reminded us she wasn’t in the clear yet. We were halfway there. All she needed to do was wake up.

Not everyone could come into the room to see her at once, so while everyone else rotated the visits, I sat down beside her and held her hand in mine. I lifted them to my lips and placed a soft kiss on her hand. If it weren’t for all the machines, it would have looked like she was sleeping peacefully. They bandaged her head. My fingers brushed gently across her cheek.

Reece and Aiden left early morning intending to come back after a shower and a couple of hours sleep. Sage left, but Link refused to leave. Alex took his parents back to the house to eat, shower and get a few hours of much needed sleep.

But I was running on empty. I wanted to see her when she woke up, but the events of the day had taken its toll on me and I lay my head beside her hand on the bed. Then I drifted off to sleep.